Ode to a Pepper Grinder
There once was a black pepper grinder
That was loved by a woman so much
It did grind so finely, so gracefully
And its surface was smooth to the touch.
Its shape was both phallic and feminine
Oh, can you imagine such a thing?
So cheap, it was allowed to get dirty
What happiness this thing did bring!
But one day the man brought two friends home
Sleek grinders by Peugeot, I think
One salt, one for pepper, quite pretty
The woman, she was tickled pink.
Until after she returned from vacation
When in want of some pepper she did find
That her dear little grinder was missing
She thought, could my husband really be so unkind?
It was true that the grinder found its fate
In the trashcan but it was too late.
'Don't know if he was sorry
But this is the moral of the story:
Don't favor black pepper over your mate.